


Never Stop Pumping

by BehindTheCellarDoor



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: Anal Fingering, Dildo Bike, Fucking Machine, Mac treating himself, Masturbation, Other, PWP, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, ass pounder 4000 - Freeform, mac works out, season 12, the work of an extremely sexual deviant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-24
Updated: 2017-03-24
Packaged: 2018-10-10 01:03:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10425771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BehindTheCellarDoor/pseuds/BehindTheCellarDoor
Summary: In the middle of remodeling their old apartment, Mac realizes he won't need his old room anymore, which only means he can finally have his private gym... and what a better way to congratulate himself for his great idea than with a heavy work out session.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I was appalled by the lack of fics featuring the Ass Pounder 4000, so I thought it was only my duty to be the first one to write one and serve the community. This is the first time I write smut, and I am ace as fuck, so excuse me. Enjoy, and remember: NEVER STOP PUMPING.

Mac was still working on renovating their old apartment. He had spent the past week looking for replicas of every single piece of furniture and decoration they used to have around the place, but when it was time to rebuild his old room he stopped at the door, looking at the empty space. He glanced back to the living room and towards Dennis’ room, which still had to be redone and brought to its original glory, and which was also the bigger of the two. The decision appeared clear as vodka in front of him: he and Dennis would sleep together in their new bed… after all, they had been sleeping with Dee and Old Man for a year, they had come accustomed to it, at least Mac had, and he knew he didn’t want to go back to sleeping alone. So there wasn’t nothing more to do, Dennis’ room will become their room, and his old sleeping space would have to hold another purpose.

The next day, Mac retrieved his workout bike from the basement of Paddy’s and placed it in the middle of his former room. “The gym”; that was what he was going to call the new resting place of the Ass Pounder 4000. The name wasn’t that far of reality, using the bike was a real workout and he was getting good results with it, he patted himself on the back for making such a great invention. He looked around the apartment, made sure the door locked (which actually didn’t matter, he wasn’t expecting anyone to come), brought a couple of towels from the bathroom, and decided that it was a good time to give himself a reward and train for a while. He didn’t bother to change into his shorts, the ones with the ventilation slits, he was alone and he didn’t have to pretend in here. Before he closed the door to the room he had taken a small bottle with a clear substance inside of it, and returned to the living room to fetch the CD player. He draped one towel over the handles of the bike, the other on the floor, plugged in the player and started blasting his favorite workout mix top volume.

“Okay, time to hit,” he said to himself as he removed his clothes, carelessly throwing them across the room. “Always warm up before a workout, always warm up,” he told himself as he slowly started to stroke his cock, his hand moving up and down all along his length, twisting a little when he got to the top. In less than a minute he was already rock hard, the tip of his dick touching his stomach when he let go of it so he could settle himself on the towel on the floor. As he lay there, he continued his ministrations, his right hand fisting his enlarged cock while he ran his left hand over his chest, letting small moans escape his lips. He didn’t want to finish yet, he was just warming up. He opened the bottle of clear liquid and squirted some of the lube onto his left hand, he put himself on all fours and carefully reached behind him, rubbing small circles around his entrance with his fingers drenched in lube. Soon, one finger was already inside of him, pumping slowly.

Mac let out a moan at the feeling, slipping a second finger in, pushing in and out slow at first but then gaining speed, twisting inside himself, making sure his hole was open and ready for his workout session. He loved the warm ups, but it was nothing like the workout itself, he thought as he slipped a third finger. After a while he decided he was ready, his right hand been stroking his cock the whole time and he was harder than ever. He stood up, grabbing the bottle, and gave the bike a few pedals so his little addition popped up. He covered the dildo in lube –just to make sure– and climbed into the bike carefully. He aligned himself with it, took a deep breath and slowly pushed himself down on the big artificial cock protruding from the seat of the bike. He let out a sob that was half a moan as he settled himself, feeling so fucking full when he bottomed out, rocking his hips and moving them in small circles which only made him grunt more. He was ready.

He grabbed the handles of the bike, planted both feet on the pedals and started pedaling, slowly. The dildo retracted into the seat and Mac whined before it came back up and started pumping into him again. He pedaled, his leaking cock bouncing against his stomach as he fucked himself. He liked to think it was not a bike, and instead it was Dennis’ huge cock that was ramming into him… the thought of Dennis made his blood boil in his veins and he started pedaling faster.

“Fuck…Fuck…” he said between pants, the dildo going in and out of his stretched hole faster and faster, deeper than he thought he could, “Fuck, Dennis, fuck me please, harder.” He had closed his eyes and was starting to really put on speed. He moaned and groaned, his cock was leaking all over his stomach as he continued to pedal. He shifted slightly and let out a scream as the fake cock hit that place that made his knees weak; he panted and moaned increasingly louder as the long cock attacked his prostate harder and harder, no mercy in his pedaling.

“Fuck, yes, just like that. Fuck” he bit his lip. He was pedaling as fast as he could, his knees already getting weak. His right hand flew to his cock and started stroking again, desperately. He bended more over the bike, letting the dick enter him from a different angle, he was a sobbing mess, wriggling in the bike, groaning and moaning. The hand on his cock was working faster, his legs following behind, and he could feel the pressure building inside him, he knew  he was close to cumming, he was so close… he gripped the handle tight with his left hand, lifted his ass from the seat and started meeting the bike’s thrusts with his own, double fucking himself. He let out a scream as he impaled himself on the cock and it hit his prostate again, and then he was cumming all over himself. He panted and brought his pedaling to the slowest again, riding his orgasm.

He rested his body against the handlebars, the fake cock still inside of him. He was sweaty and he was sticky with cum. He grabbed the towel and wiped down his stomach and his overly sensitive cock. After a few minutes he stepped down from the bike, his legs almost giving out, cleaned the prosthetic with the same towel and then threw it across the room. He was going to take a long shower, and maybe the next day he would work out a little more… after all, he needed to be in his best shape if he was going to finish rebuilding the apartment.

 


End file.
